WWYD?

I have a friend, a really really old friend. This guy was one of the best friends I ever had twenty years ago. It was a very odd friendship--he was something like 15 years old then me and I was twenty years old.

Jack would have done --and did --anything for me. He had very little but what he did he shared. He was a great friend, made me happy when I was sad, fixed my car, made me laugh. When I left Georgia for Ohio I cried most of the way there because I knew I would miss him. When I moved to California for law school, one year he sent me what I am sure was his last $300 just to make sure my daughter had a Christmas because I had nothing for her and no money.

He had a crush on me I think, feelings that were not shared, but he was an amazing friend. When Charley and I got together, I sensed Jack was jealous. We stopped corresponding not long after that. I thought that Jack had always held a torch for me, and once I was in a long term relationship, it was too hard for him to continue the friendship. That was almost 10 years ago.

I didn't hear from Jack for years. . .every now and I again I thought of him and it made me sad that I would never hear from him again. I had no way of getting in touch with him. I knew he had moved on from Atlanta to start grad school but I didn't know where or what had become of him.

In May of 2009 I suddenly get a message from him on MySpace. He was ALIVE. But he had gone through HELL. He had started grad school but dropped out when his mom died. He had crashed and burned after that, two heart attacks, four strokes. He's been homeless, in a psych hospital. All kinds of issues. He was on disability, had issues walking but was able to sometimes to a computer at the library.

Another friend had supplied a prepaid cell phone and we started texting back and forth. Calls were hard because he had trouble talking after his stroke. . .and I am not a big phone person given I am usually at work or chasing a toddler. I started adding minutes to his phone so we could text since otherwise we couldn't. Every two months or so I plop 20 bucks on his phone...works.

So Jack has major issues, he gets disability, they take a couple hundred out of his check for defaulted student loans, another couple hundred for medicare. He barely has enough to cover rent, almost none for food, and cannot work yet since he cannot walk more that 20 feet without sitting down.

I have sent him a few pizzas over the last few months but Pizza's are not real food. There are times, like this last week, where he texts me that he only has a box of mac and cheese and oatmeal to last a week.

I want to help him but how? Did I mention he is back in Georgia and I am in California? I looked for grocery delivery where I can send him groceries but the small town he lives in doesn't have that capability. I looked into food bank things, like Angel Food--but there stuff is freezer food and he doesn't have a freezer.

He had asked me for a messenger bag if I ever thought of it, for when he takes the bus to the library, this week I got on Amazon found one cheep, and sent it. While I was on there, I checked out their food supply and sent him a bunch of Healthy Choice mixers -- they are shelf stable foods that we have in our pantry. I sent him about $80 bucks worth or three six packs of various food. Shipping was free through amazon since it was over $25. I was really proud of my self for thinking of that. . .and then I realized that those were microwavable. Quick text --nope he doesn't have a microwave in his small efficiency. So I jumped on Wal-Mart, found a $30 microwave with free shipping, and sent that as well. Kinda didn't have a choice because I had already ordered the food. Sigh.

I know I don't "owe" this guy anything but really I do. Jack probably saved my life more times then I can count, he was a life raft for me at a time I was at the bottom of the bottom...he kept me from slipping over the edge so many times. Having a friend like that made me believe that life was worth living. . .my life was worth living...when I felt that there was no future.

Today, I am doing the same for him. He ranges from suicidal to depressed and apparently a text from me makes him go on. He has to do exercises for physical therapy, and I am working with him on doing those so he can get better and go back to work. I am trying to help him as much as I can. . .but I know too well how hard moving forward can be when your belly is empty.

So how can I help? How can I make sure he has nutritious food? Sending money doesn't really help, he doesn't have a way to the grocery and can only buy what he can hold while riding a bus. . .and using a cane. He needs a ride to the store, someone to help him buy the food, and a way home. He only has a tiny fridge, no freezer so needs shelf stable food. How do I get that across the country to Georgia?

I feel so bad. What can I do? How can I help?